We hope to make our first milestone soon, release of the first draft, in this the inaugural work in the fledgling field we dub “Nicknomics”. For those unaware, we are seeking to plot the ramifying confusion of Elisha’s nicknames before they explode beyond all possibility of cataloguing. It is expected that the register, when formed in all of its multibranching and nefariously looping behaviour, having wrought untold damage on the vocabularies of NNF, IWNM and others unlucky enought to have been sucked into its merciless vortex, has been stretched end to end, will circumscribe the earth, no doubt taking in ‘Kevin Bacon’ at least once. What started with pen and paper and good old fashioned human memory has now given way to the more technologically (and zoologically) advanced employment of a million monkeys on typewriters. Delays have arisen due to banana related logistical problems, but we hope to have the first draft posted soon here for peer review.